Good sleepy, soggy morning to you! I resisted at first, strongly tempted by the warmth of my covers, but I knew that more was available to me out here at my kitchen table. Last night, I resolved to get up early, contingent on how often Levi woke up (Yes, he's still getting up. Don't even go there with me right now.). He slept pretty well, so I had no reason to climb back in bed after his 5am feeding, but the warmth of the covers whispered to me, lying to me about the possibilities of more rest. "I'll just close my eyes here for a few minutes, then get up," "I'm sure the boys will sleep well this morning and I can sleep more and still get an hour of alone time before they get up," and then my favorite thought that I was almost sold on this morning, "It's President's Day!"(Like the government calendar has anything to do with my morning.)
I know that I am a happier, healthier person when I get up early. This is where I do my quiet and thoughtful reading. When I skip this time, I scramble and rush throughout the day, and never can come back to this place at any other time. It's not for everyone, but I know I am a morning person. I am also very thankful for a strong cup of coffee.
We are welcoming wellness into this house this week. The flu is an epidemic, right?! It's nuts out there. Levi developed a fever a week ago, Saturday night, and Lincoln had one starting the following Sunday. We kicked Daddy out of the house and my mom came over. She should have been wearing a cape! She was a wonderful help with the boys and the household tasks, making the whole ordeal not so bad. The best part is that we got to enjoy some much-needed time together.
But, left to my own choices, I wouldn't have asked her to come. The first night was very difficult. Everyone started out on the couch, Levi wanted to be held all night, and both boys barely slept. I would have been alone here, struggling, crying, wallowing in self-pity, and pulling my hair out if it weren't for mom.
I have to confess something to you because I know that I may be encouraging at least one reader: I struggle with pride. I think I am a super mom who can do all of the things and I don't need anyone else's help. To be more accurate, I love help, but I don't want to have to ask for it. Mom started off by simply telling me to let her know when I needed her and I stubbornly thought "She should know that I need her NOW and she'll need to stay!" If I had to tell her, then forget about it!
It seems so silly now and I'm glad that it all worked out in the case of Flumageddon 2018, but pride's ugly head appears in my life often. I have been dealing with my own unmet expectations. I have become so frustrated with everything. My attitude has been in the dumps, and unfortunately this has been going on for months. There are a few things swirling together into a discontent, irritable tornado in my heart.
Housework! The never-ending pile of things to be done. This one chips away at me every day because it will never be complete. I have yet to find a tolerable balance between work and rest when it comes to the house.
Business! Finding time to consistently work in my office (which also needs a dose of organization).
Toddler growing into a big boy and having a mind and determination of his own! Wowzers this is the main one. I have been working with children for altogether 7 plus years, but, until now, I have never known the frustration of dealing with my own child. This little guy is particularly strong-minded, and I find myself frequently saying "Raising kids is NOT for the faint of heart!" At this age, he is learning that he can make some decisions on his own and he wants to make them all! He wants to resist everything just for the sake of resisting sometimes! Whew!! And I let him get to me. I allow his emotional state to affect mine, and I ride the roller coaster with him.
Then, I know I should know better and do better and all of the shoulds start flowing into my mind. This is all to say that I fall short of what I "should" be every. single. day. I'm seeking joy in the state of the house and my business. In the compliance of my three-year-old. These are all subject to change constantly. If you are struggling like me, join me in praying for joy.
Thank you, God that you have come so that we "may have life and have it abundantly" (John 10:10). "The thief" calls to mind all of the things that we are not doing well enough, reminds us of where we are falling short, but You came so that we can be loved unconditionally and find our identity in You. Remind us throughout the day that Your sacrifice is enough to cover all of our shortcomings. Be our guiding voice today, and give us the strength to turn to you when we are weak throughout the day. I pray all of this in Jesus's name, amen.
Enjoy your President's Day! If you need that excuse to rest a little more today, take it! Love y'all!
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