We mapped out the entire thing yesterday afternoon. Dr. G was so patient, he really made us feel comfortable. The visit took about an hour and all we were doing was talking about the process. Yes, I am nervous and scared and excited. I know that God is using this trial in our lives to bring us closer to Him. He could have healed Chad and given us a baby without using IVF, but our journey will bring glory to Him maybe more powerfully than if He had just given us a baby. Only He knows the reasons.
The doctor asked us when we wanted to get started. We said "right away!" Next week we will be back in the office learning about injection medication instructions and then we will just wait until my next period. My mind could swim with the "what ifs"and sometimes it does: what if one medication is really hard on my body, what if it doesn't work the first time, what if we go way into debt because of all that is needed, what if I get really sick. Then I remember that we have God on our side and he will give my body and mind the strength required. He has brought us to this point, He will not leave us. We also have to remind ourselves that it is His timeline. We can plan all we want about when I would be pregnant and when the baby would be due, etc. but it makes no difference. God is in control. I am so thankful it is not up to me.
I'll be keeping you updated on the roller-coaster ride from here. In the meantime, I am reading this book:
The doctor asked us when we wanted to get started. We said "right away!" Next week we will be back in the office learning about injection medication instructions and then we will just wait until my next period. My mind could swim with the "what ifs"and sometimes it does: what if one medication is really hard on my body, what if it doesn't work the first time, what if we go way into debt because of all that is needed, what if I get really sick. Then I remember that we have God on our side and he will give my body and mind the strength required. He has brought us to this point, He will not leave us. We also have to remind ourselves that it is His timeline. We can plan all we want about when I would be pregnant and when the baby would be due, etc. but it makes no difference. God is in control. I am so thankful it is not up to me.
I'll be keeping you updated on the roller-coaster ride from here. In the meantime, I am reading this book:
The writer seemed to have a really difficult time with the process and with the pregnancy, but that is her journey, not mine. I am devouring any literature I can about in vitro right now, and it can be overwhelming.
You are strong, beautiful and courageous. You stood by my side through my entire transplant and I am in love with you more and more every day. God wants us to have a family and He will provide. We will weather this journey together, as we always do. God is awesome and has put us together as soul mates. I will stand by you and be here during everything. I love you.
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